Golf Central

He might look tough on the outside and can powerlift much more than his own weight, but KJ Choi could be scared of ants, which are also very strong for their size. Yes, ants. ... Plus, SG Matthews looks at why Mexican food might not be good for Lorena Ochoa, the bike-wreck that is David Feherty, and a few other reasons why this week's spin through our wacky world of golf goes a bit sideways ...

1. KJ is the king of cool in the US, but maybe not in Korea:

Veteran KJ Choi has gotten the reputation as one of the nicest laid-back pros in America, living the American dream, signing heaps of visors, and maintaining a Korea cool persona that makes seem a bit of an Asian Elvis. But put him back in his native land and it's a different story. Playing in front of huge galleries at the Ballantine's Championship at Jeju Island, Korea last night, KJ complained about fans using mobile phones and cameras. "I don't think they realise how loud they were. I think the gallery needs to understand they are going to have to stop bringing cameras and answering their cellphones." Wow, Oh-so not KJ-like ...

2. And cell-phone ringing fans aren't the only things that bug KJ ...:

Ants!!! Choi also complained after the first round over a hill of ants. Yes, ants. KJ's round was disrupted when his tee shot on No. 7 landed near an anthill, and had to wait for a ruling over a penalty or a free drop. KJ was a bit concerned that the ants were fire ants, and thought he might be entitled to relief under the "dangerous situation" rule. He was told there are no fire ants in Jeju. Choi ended up making double-bogey after the delay. No fire ants, no freebies, baby ...

3. Being Mexican might not be so good for Lorena Ochoa:

Despite the fact that she is a national treasure in Mexico, like Choi is in Korea, Ochoa doesn't always bring her A-game when she plays south of the US-Mexican border. In seven LPGA starts on Mexican soil, Ochoa has only one victory, despite 18 LPGA Tour wins overall. The latest instance was last weekend when Ochoa finished well off the pace set by winner Louise Friberg at the MasterCard Classic in Huixquilucan, greater Mexico City. "There's a lot of pressure," said Ochoa's countrywoman Paola Zermeno, simplying the obvious ...

4. Where's the beef?

It was a little bit strange seeing a couple of old-school beefy boys turn up at Bay Hill looking like shadows of their former selves. Vijay Singh had dropped nearly 16 pounds in a week, and skinny Vijay had the lead after two rounds (a bout with food poisoning from India had helped Singh shed the baggage). But Lee Westwood was also looking lean and mean thanks to an obviously successful workout regime. We might have to start calling the Worksop lad "Camilo" soon ...

5. Still the same old Monty though ...:

Colin Montgomerie needed a really decent finish at Bay Hill to help him back on his wayward path to Augusta. He didn't get it though, missing the cut and needing a finish in the top four at Doral to avoid missing his first major tee time since the 1991 PGA Championship, which John Daly won ... The cutoff date for entries to Augusta is March 31. And unlike Vijay or Westwood, it doesn't look like Monty has missed many meals lately ...

6. A knock on the head didn't ruin David Feherty's sense of humour:

The Ulster telly pundit and funnyman suffered a scare when he was pelted off his bicycle by a truck in Dallas and broke three ribs. The wit was intact, however. Since taking up cycling to keep fit, Feherty has had scrapes before but those came "when you hit the ground and slow down." Getting hit by a truck, however, "was flying through the air and speeding up ... it was entirely different and not near as much fun," Feherty said. Get well soon, David ...

7. George Lopez isn't quite as funny as Feherty (or Bob Hope) ...:

After lending his name to Hope's old celebrity-studded Palm Springs winter event for two years on the PGA Tour, Lopez is being replaced as host for 2009 by Arnold Palmer. The edgy Chicano comedian, it is reported, didn't "connect" with the event's filthy-rich galleries as well as tournament organisers would have liked. "We're trying to bring a special guy out of the hat," tournament president John Foster said. Palmer, who won the first edition of the event in 1960, certainly qualifies ...

8. It was a good/bad week for the Bryant brothers:

Brad and Bart Bryant both got oh-so-close to the finishing line, with Brad (with the classic handle of "Dr Dirt") falling in a playoff on the Champions Tour, while younger brother Bart took Tiger Woods to the wire before falling when Tiger's drama-laced putt on the 72nd hole fell. Had both Bryant brothers won, it would have been the first time family members have won on the same day since Bob Duval (Senior Tour) and his son David (PGA Tour) won on March 28, 1999 ...

9. Good news for caddies in a bad week:

Earlier this week we reported on how rough it can be for caddies when the whims of egotistical professional golfers are involved on the European Tour. But there was good news as well when it was announced that at this year's EDS Byron Nelson Championship, the champion's caddie will win an $85,000 Cadillac XLR-V, which is one sweet ride. The good news for PGA Tour loopers? Steve Williams, Tiger Woods' obscenely wealthy caddie, probably won't win. Tiger won the 1997 Byron Nelson but hasn't played there since 2005, when his streak of 142 cuts made was ended ...

10. NFL coaches are no good as caddies:

-- Good old Freddie Couples weighed in on John Daly's latest fiasco at Bay Hill, reflecting that Daly using Tampa Bay Buccaneers head coach Jon Gruden as a caddie at the PODS was embarrassing for the PGA Tour. In the way only he can say it, Fred said: "I'm not bashing Jon Gruden, but he doesn't know yardages." ... Ummm, Freddie. Gruden is an NFL head coach. Ever heard of first down and 10 yards to go? The quotebook hath been amended for another week ...

'Til next week! ...