Golf Central

How beautiful is this?: Shall we count the ways? 65 strokes, 5-under for a 48-year-old Fred Couples at Bay Hill, and after a week of slogging after John Daly everything is sweet as silk again.
It's like stepping back in time, except you can't really step into time, can you?: Who are you, Fred Couples? ... Only Freddie is allowed to really torture the hell out of quotes on this website, pal.
Ahhh, this is good ...: Yes it is. Time for a cigar and a port. Even Tiger Woods, five shots behind, had to open his "W-at-all-costs" heart and say it was good to see Couples tied with JJ Henry on top of the leaderboard. That's saying something. And it's not JJ Henry I'm talking about.
Speaking of saying something, get to the good stuff! What did Freddie say after his round?: He had some beauties. Reminiscing about his duel with Phil Mickelson in the Masters two years ago, Freddie said: "I just couldn't get him when the nitty-gritty was the nitty-gritty ..."
And when is the nitty-gritty not the nitty-gritty?: I'm not sure! Maybe when it's just nitty, or gritty. And then, reflecting on his career as a whole, Freddie said: "You have to have the numbers. I know that I'm certainly talked about, but do I need to be in there? I would like to be in there. Should I be in there? Probably not. But I'm close."
What did he mean by that?: I have absolutely no clue! But I'm sure he meant it. And he certainly meant it when he was talking about his back pain.
What did Freddie say?: He said: "I don't fear my back. My back will go out and when it does, I'll know. But as far as worrying about it, there's not much you can do."
Except for worry about it, perhaps ...: Perhaps. But isn't he a gem?
Isn't he just. How many points do you reckon our hero Freddie would score in a Me Myself & I interview?: Probably a big fat zero. But it would be the most entertaining zero you ever had. To say Freddie takes life one shot at a time would be like saying you could actually step back into time, which we know you can't do.
You've been hanging around Fred Couples too much ...: That's the end of the interview, pal ... Stogie and port time ...
Stogie and port ...: Sure is nice. Got your slippers?