Golf Central

Ryan Palmer: "You don't need any help scaring the birds away Chad"

First round of the first tournament of the first Fall Series... were there any more firsts?: Jeff Gove made his first shot from the fairway all year after holing a 100 yard sand-wedge for eagle to put him at joint first with Chad Campbell on seven-under.
And who else is up there?: John Senden, Steve Flesch, Matthew Goggin and Brendon de Jonge are all one shot back on six-under. Goggin and de Jonge actually had a share of the lead but both dropped a shot at the last hole.
Goggin and de Jonge? They sound like an upmarket jewellery shop...: Umm well they're not.
Fair enough. Anything else of interest happen?: John Daly had to withdraw after seven holes after complaining of flu. He had shot three bogies and three putted the seventh by this point...
What are you suggesting?: Nothing... nothing... just a bit suspicious that he stopped once he got to three over.
Or he could just have had the flu of course: I guess. Or maybe he had some plans for the weekend and was just pulling a sickie.
That reminds me...I've got a migraine – got to go.: ...

 Team photo for the 23rd PGA Cup, Oconee Course, Reynolds Plantation, September 19, 2007.

"Cinderella story. Outta nowhere."

Holla whut?: Beg pardon?
Holla whut? – it means 'what's going on?': Then why didn't you just say that?
Sometimes I like to get mad gangster to prove I'm still down: Well you sound like a geography teacher trying to be cool.
Ouch. OK just get on with it then: Well, Sweden’s Martin Erlandsson played a blinder and fired a course record, nine-under-par 63...
So he's leading then?: Obviously, you div. His countryman Jarmo Sandelin and South Africa’s Richard Sterne lie joint second having both shot a 65 while in tied fourth we have Denmark’s Sǿren Kjeldsen and France’s Raphaél Jacquelin on six-under par 66's.
And how did Rory McIlroy do:? In his first appearance as a pro he shot an excellent, bogey-free 69.
I remember on my first day in my first job I flooded the bathroom: That's why you're here asking stupid questions and McIlroy is out there rubbing shoulders with the top players in Europe.
I bet he doesn't pop and lock as fresh as me: You really are a prat. You know that?

Spot 'The Warriors' cast member on a break from filming
 

On this day, in 1980, Lee Trevino won the Texas Open by one stroke at Oak Hills Country Club, San Antonio.

Lee Buck Trevino was born in Texas in 1939, to Mexican parents and is known as one the most popular American-Mexican sportsmen ever. As a child, 'The Merry Mex' lived in poverty and worked in the cotton fields from the age of five and began caddying at the age of eight. It was here that Trevino perfected his game playing the three practice holes behind the caddie hut.

At 17, Trevino enlisted in the U.S Marine Corps and served four years before joining the PGA Tour in 1967. 'Supermex' won 29 times on Tour and has six majors to his name, winning the British Open, the US PGA and US Open two times apiece and earning him a spot in the World Golf Hall of Fame in 1981. Trevino was known as one of the biggest jokers on the Tour, memorably throwing a rubber snake at Jack Nicklaus before their US Open playoff in 1971.

Also on this day, in 1765, Antoine de Beauterne, a professional wolf hunter, claimed that he had killed the mysterious Beast of Gévaudan, a monster that had been terrorising and killing country-siders in South central France. He received tons of titles and awards before he was found out when dozens more people were killed. Luckily for him, he was miles away by then and enjoying wine and peasant girls on tap.

Meanwhile, in South-Delhi in 1995, the Hindu Milk Miracle occurred as statues of the Hindu God Ganesh began drinking milk from spoons. The hungry deity was later heard asking for some Crunchy Nut Cornflakes to be added but his request fell on deaf ears as they only had Shreddies to hand.

And it's Girolamo Savonarola! As they say in the Dominican Order, to; skinny, socialite idiot Nicole Richie (26), mouthy, punchy singer Liam Gallagher (35) and a special mention to Bill Murray who is 57 today. Just one in a long list of great films, Bill starred in Caddyshack; possibly the best and certainly the funniest golf movie ever. He has also appeared in several Pro-Ams, visits many top tournaments and to top it all off was arrested last month for drink-driving a golf cart through central Stockholm. Bill, we salute you.

'It's a short dogleg left but that thousand miles to the right is out of bounds'

Remember that scene in Crocodile Dundee where Paul Hogan has to play a tricky three-iron out of a kangaroo's pouch while narrowly avoiding a crocodile's fangs and then has to travel half a day to get to the next hole? No? OK, that's because it never happened but soon it'll be a reality as the World's longest and wildest golf course has just been given the go-ahead by Australian officials.

To be based on the unforgiving Nullarbor Plain, the 18 hole course, due for completion next year, will spread over 840 miles of desert between Western and Southern Australia. With holes up to 180 miles away from each other, in oppressively humid conditions and on some of the most arrid land in the World, playing the course is as much a test of endurance as it is golfing prowess.

Roughly a quarter of a million visitors pass through the plain a year and it's hoped that the course will provide them with a reason to stop off at some of the more remote locations; play a hole, have a drink and then move on. Playing the entire course is estimated to take about two or three days, about the same amount of time I spend on a normal course when having a particularly bad round.

Crocodile Dundee hitting the links is not as far fetched as you might think, as all manner of animals that would delight in turning you into a skeleton baking in the sun will be roaming around the outback and golfers will be advised accordingly. Having Mick Dundee as a caddie would definitely be a plus, not only as protection but to help read the 'browns'; a mixture of sand and oil which will feature instead of greens.

The ambitious project, which is partly being funded by the Australian federal tourism minister, will wind it's way down the desolate Eyre Highway from Ceduna on the coast to Kagoorlie in the West.