Golf Central

I told you Martin Kaymer was going to win. …: Indeed you did. Last year, in fact. And it's about time … I think this the first of many European Tour   victories we're going to see from this talented young German.
So is everyone all over the "marching relentlessly" to victory thing yet? …: I am. I don't know if one of our friends from Germany is yet.
Well, it wasn't quite so relentless Sunday, was it? …: Not unless you count marching in reverse as relentless, however, Kaymer had built such a big lead that even his closing 74 was good enough.
Rounds of 66, 65, 68 will do that for you …: For sure. But that didn't stop veterans like Lee Westwood and Henrik Stenson from thinking they had a chance.
Of course not. They're veterans, that's what veterans are supposed to do … think that they can win …: Well, it sure looks like we'll be speaking about Martin Kaymer in a similar vein quite soon. The ceiling is very high for a player like him. He's only 23, might be Europe's best pure ball-striker, and he seems like he really loves the game.
So what's your prediction for Kaymer now then? …: I can see majors for him in the future. Possibly wins on the US PGA Tour as well …
First conquer Europe, then the world! …: Oh God, here we go again …

Wow. Where the heck did DJ Trahan come from?…: I know, I know. Here I was just concentrating on DJ Homicide and DJ Lethal and here comes another DJ to rock our world.

Well, he's got a pretty good pedigree…: You can say that. He's a former Walker Cup player who led Clemson to the NCAA championship. But you can't say you really saw DJ joining the ranks of the PGA Tour winners this weekend.

Speaking of ranking, what was that, exactly?…: DJ was only No. 217 in the world going into the Hope, and a pretty stinky No. 170 on the putting statistics. Not exactly much to give you a heck of a lot of hoping in a tournament where birdies are at a premium.

He made enough of them, didn't he?…: Indeed he did. DJ came firing back from four shots behind Justin Leonard, the veteran who everyone thought had this tournament sewn up, to rampage the Classic Club with a closing 65.

And he's got a cool goatee too …: Goes to show you what being a clean-shaven, clean-living guy like Justin Leonard will do for you.

He'd better not shave it off, now …: Nope. DJ has got his only two PGA Tour wins with that goatee. The other one was at the Southern Farm Bureau Classic in 2006, which secured his playing privileges on the Tour for two years. Now he's set for another two.

Wonder why it doesn't work for Rafa Benitez? …: Not sure … I just think there are some times it's just not worth worrying about things like that.

And this is one of them? …: Yep … See you and Tiger at Torrey Pines!

Not if I see you first: Thanks for that...

 

Well, the sentimental favourite faded back a bit, didn't he ...: A bit, really. ... Robert Gamez has still shot rounds of 66-65-67-71 for a 19-under total. ...
Except ...: Well, except that it's just that Justin Leonard has shot four better, that's all. The little Texan has made 24 birdies so far, which is what you need to do in a birdie-fest.
I see. Well, with all the low scoring this week it still might be anybody's game, then ...: Anybody within 6 shots, probably, which still puts about 11 guys in the mix. After all, David Duval won this thing with a 59 in the final round in '99, so anything's possible.
And bye bye celebrities, too ...: Yes! And for once the hard-bitten pros can play without any hackers on their wings. It should make for a good day out in the desert.
Do you think Leonard can hold on? ...: Well, he's a veteran who's going through a bit of a career renaissance right now. So, yes. ... but then again, so is Gamez. Mind you, after all Gamez has been through the last 18 years, I'm pretty sure he'd be happy with second place and a big fat paycheck and keeping his card.
Yeah. Losing your card a couple times does that to you doesn't it? ...: It must. Gamez won in his very first PGA Tour start, and what a roller-coaster ride it has been for him since.
So where are you off to in such a hurry? ...: I'm going to go see a Scottish band that no one has ever heard of called the Pearlfishers. Let me know how the golf goes, OK?
Opting for obscure Scottish bands instead of this scintillating golf are you? ...: Well, we've got people spanning the globe right now to give our readers the very best in golf coverage. I imagine there will be hundreds of birdies between here and Abu Dhabi til then, and one of the reasons the Pearlfishers are so obscure is that they play a gig like every 10 years or so ...
So the Pearlfishers are are not the Vijay Singh of music? ...: Let's put it this way, but I might be the only guy there. It would strain my brain too far at this point to come up with an apt analogy, but definitely not. Vijay. Robert Gamez is closer ...
See you down the road then ...: Down the road ...

Martin Kaymer sounds like a kid who can't wait for Christmas ...: And why shouldn't he? The way he's playing, his first European Tour victory is right around the corner.
It's not often you hear a golfer say "I can't wait for tomorrow" ...: No, but then again, most of them aren't as unbelievably talented as Kaymer ... nor do they have what looks like an unassailable six-shot lead going into the final round.
I don't want to jinx the boy, but ...: Yeah, I know, I know. This is golf and anything can happen. But we've been tipping the 23-year-old from Dusseldorf for great things all year, and barring a catastrophe of immense magnitude, he can only give the tournament away.
In which case, he'll be wishing he hadn't said "I can't wait for tomorrow" ...: Indeed. But I really don't think Kaymer is going to blow it. Engand's Anthony Wall, Sweden's Henrik Stenson, and Ryder Cup veteran Lee Westwood are well behind him, and only Stenson is the kind of player that can make enough birdies to overtake Kaymer. It would take a career round from Stenson and a total collapse from Kaymer.
Speaking of birdies, how many is that for Kaymer through three rounds now? ...: His scorecard is literally riddled with red numbers. He's made 17 birdies and an eagle so far, with only 2 bogeys, through 54 holes. Unbelievable golf for a kid his age.
How do you say "birdie" in German? ...: Well, the German golfers just say "birdie" like everyone else. But a bird, in German, is vogel. That's why, in the 1940s, the German plane the Stuka was called a kanonen vogel: bird with cannons.
Why does that matter? ...: Oh, well, we mentioned Kaymer's nationality the other day and someone (probably German) posted on this site that we should not make fun of nationalities, despite the fact that we praised Kaymer's golf to the highest. They said "we will have red face".
Did you mention the war? ...: Not directly, but some English guy did in the pub before we wrote the wrap-up. ... So that was still on our mind and we were joking about how the English are always "mentioning the war", but that the Germans do not ... anyway, sometimes in this funny world we call the internet people take things the wrong way.
That explains it then. How do you say "idiot" in German?...: Idiot, I think.
How do you say "deleted comment" in German?...: Not sure, but I think it's Kommentar löschen ...